In defence of limitations…

As a coach, I have allot of training and tools to help people “move past” limiting beliefs or ideas that hold them back from doing and being what they desire.

This is useful and liberating.

I define limiting ideas as thoughts that are either not true or not true for us and cause us pain. I love that there are tools and processes we can use to liberate ourselves from these phantom shackles.

But I am not totally sold that limitations of any kind, thoughts, or otherwise are things we need to move past.

There is another side to “limitations” that does not get as much airtime.

My social feeds reveal a self-development world that seems awfully fond of moving, nay, even BLASTING beyond limitations.

“Start before you are ready!”. “Feel the fear and do it anyway!”. “Don’t let anyone hold you back!”. “Push through the resistance!”. “Conquer your procrastination!”. “Get comfortable with discomfort!” and so on and so forth.

There is a tendency to treat very real limitations like they are pesky, inconvenient barriers between us and our best lives.

I believe there is great liberation and freedom in our ability to honor, love, and respect our limitations.

In my years of teaching yoga, I saw people perpetuate terrible injuries on themselves by refusing to respect the limitations of their flesh and bones.

Burnout is a buzzword everywhere right now. We are simply not trained to understand and respect our boundaries and limitations be they energetic or emotional.

Human minds, hearts, and bodies have real limitations that are as individual as fingerprints and constantly in flux.

I see our destruction of the natural world as an extension of this inability to respect limitations, even the material limitation of what this planet can offer up to humanity.

Recently a professional request was made of me that almost every part of me wanted to agree to. Almost. But I also know that this request might bump up against my own emotional limitations.

I have been reflecting on how much shame arises in me around this fact. It is not borne out by reality. In fact, I believe that I am considering my own limitations in this regard because I am a skilled, caring, responsible professional. And yet it is still difficult.

Now I am flush against my own limiting belief that it is somehow not ok or even shameful to have certain kinds of limits.

How strange.

How strange to see limits as problematic, shameful, something to move past in a quest to be better.

What if they are something we can move into?

What if by resting and listening to our internal limitations we may receive their gifts. They hold so much information about our humanity and human needs.

I love the idea of honoring our limits, listening to them, examining them, and waiting to see what happens. In my experience, some simply dissolve in the face of curiosity, love, and acceptance and some have important lessons to teach us in a culture fixated on more and better.

Our limits may be protecting us and preparing us for the divine plan of our life to unfold perfectly.

If a thought or belief is not true, it will gently fade in the light of our loving attention. No need to push or blast past anything.

There is freedom in humility, in honoring our human fragility and the tremendous natural forces we are subjected to. I believe this is paradoxically a way we can align ourselves with the way, the flow, and have access to the unfathomable power of this bright universe.